Thursday, May 12, 2005

This Day in History

The New York Times online edition has a feature called "On This Day" in which it gives a major headline for something that happened in the past on the current particular date. For example, on this day in 1943, the North African front in WWII was officially won by the Allies. But what about all those May 12ths in the annals of history? You know, the ones that weren't so celebrated or devastating or divisive or unifying. What about days like today? They're never included in the "On This Day" section of any paper, unless, perhaps, the storied New Prague Times, which often contains several momentous occasions dating back 25, 50, 75, and 100 years. Examples of such occasions include a farmer purchasing a new cow, or the overnight stay of a middle management equivalent traveling shoe salesman arriving on the train. But I digress...

Will May 12, 2005, go down in anyone's history books? Let's peruse the headlines: requisite North Korea and Middle East coverage; our national legislators trying to insert pork into an unmemorable and ineffective transportation bill; and the revelation that Macaulay Culkin really wasn't molested by Michael Jackson. These could be the headlines just about every day of the week for the past month or so, with some minor tweaking.

I mean look at John Bolton (embattled nominee for the post of ambassador to the United Nations). He has a front page story, AND David Brooks gives him at least six inches. All for what? Whether he's confirmed or not, nobody knows who the hell he is today and nobody will know who he is tomorrow or next month or next year. It's just a rigamarole. In all actuality, it's quite similar to this post. Inefficient and inarticulate musings that go 'round and 'round the May pole with nothing to tie it together. It's the beauty of my genius.

Of course, this is all my innate boredom talking. I've been in my office for going on four hours now and haven't successfully accomplished one work-related task. Not only haven't I accomplished any work-related tasks, I haven't even worked on any work-related tasks. After all, it is May 12, and we have damn-near-freezing rain (not sure if that should be hyphenated...erred on the side of cautioned) in Minneapolis. If that's not a call for supreme laziness at work, I don't know what is.

Oh yeah: Don't forget to shop the New Prague City-Wide Garage Sale. I'm sure it'll be a good one.

No comments: