Wednesday, June 20, 2007

Miller Lite

I am a recovering beer snob. I was that guy that chortled every time that somebody ordered a major domestic beer. However, somewhere along the way I decided that all mass produced beers weren't all that bad, and in fact some rather decent. But until recently I would never stoop to drink a light beer. But as my waistline expands and I get older I am slowly reconciling myself to light beer. The turning point occured occured while I was in Dallas and had just finished a 5k run (I actually ran the entire time, not that is an accomplishment for most people but if you have ever seen me in person you will recognize it as such). The 5k was sponsored by Michelob Ultra and thus this lightest of light beers was abundant and free. In the hot Dallas weather and my body still teetering on the brink of cardiac arrest, I found Michelob Ultra to be the perfect refreshment. It was cold, had some body but not too much for the setting, and actually sorta tasted like beer. While I still prefer full bodied beers, a light does just fine in the right situation. That said, I don't understand the reverance that some show for Miller Lite. It has no taste, none, absolutely none. People that drink Miller Lite honestly do not like beer. They claim to but this is impossible as they only drink Miller Lite which in no way resembles the taste of beer. It tastes like decent tap water and looks like the urine from somebody that is pretty well hydrated. Which makes the obsession with Miller Lite baffling to me. When people order a Miller Lite they almost do so with a sense of pride. I must be missing something. Is this code, or maybe some cruel hoax operated by a vast non-partisan conspiracy (you know, like how art historians have for years been able to persuade the viewing public that Leonardo's Mona Lisa is in fact amazing or that anything by Mark Rothko is worthwhile). I don't know, I am missing something here.


archduke f. f. said...

Huge conspiracy. Miller Lite is actually code for "I'm going to take someone home and have sex with them. And I don't care if that someone is ugly."

xtrachromosomeconservative said...

I guess that makes sense. Thanks for ruining my conspiracy speculation.