Pie-Eyed Pickle of the Week

The pie-eyed pickle of the week goes to Dick (Prague Meeting) Cheney for his pie-eyed note of confidence voiced on CNN's Larry King Live: "I think they're in the last throes, if you will, of the insurgency." Ah yes, the proverbial last throes, which must seem to Bush's press spokesman, Scott McClellan, as neverending as the questions those darn journalists, angling for some credible evidence in favor of Cheney's pie-eyed diagnosis, keep posing:

Q Scott, is the insurgency in Iraq in its last throes?

MR. McCLELLAN: Terry, you have a desperate group of terrorists in Iraq that are doing everything they can to try to derail the transition to democracy....

Q But the insurgency is in its last throes?

MR. McCLELLAN: The Vice President talked about that the other day...

Q But they're killing more Americans, they're killing more Iraqis. That's the last throes?

MR. McCLELLAN: Innocent -- I say innocent civilians...

Q Right. What is the evidence that the insurgency is in its last throes?

MR. McCLELLAN: I think I just explained to you the desperation of terrorists and their tactics.

Q What's the evidence on the ground that it's being extinguished?

MR. McCLELLAN: Terry, we're making great progress to defeat the terrorist and regime elements....

Q Well, I'm just wondering what the metric is for measuring the defeat of the insurgency.

MR. McCLELLAN: Well, you can go back and look at the Vice President's remarks. I think he talked about it.

Q Yes. Is there any idea how long a last throe lasts for?

Dick, I'm afraid that the Iraq insurgency is not in a pickle — you are.—PEP